A quick overview (and also in my 2ww)

This is long because it encompasses close to 6 years of info – I promise they will probably never be this long – long posts are tough to read sometimes, I know… 

I’m not sure if I like to type more than I like to spew information but each will be codependent of the other so, here goes..

I’ve enjoyed tremendously reading two specific blogs about 2 women’s fertility journey’s – one was UK based and the other I assume (though she doesn’t say specifically) is US based.  Both kept me awake some nights as I couldn’t wait to scroll in the opposite direction (??) up the page to see what would happen next.  I read one entire 2 year journey in 2 days – it was like reading a really good book.  This has inspired me to tell my own crazy stories, and I hope to be nearly a fraction as comical as they both have been…

My story began about 6 years ago while I worked with a woman who had had one child.  Mr. D (my hubby) and I had house-sat several times for said coworker and their dog.  She and I sat directly across from one another and I would often (unwillingly) hear her private conversations.  The one that stood out for me was the one where she discussed her infertility (inability to have a 2nd child) with her husband on the phone.  I heard her say that for her to have an anonymous donor, it would cost $xx,xxx and to have a ‘friend’, it would cost $x,xxx.  That’s one less x and one entire jump of the comma.  For me, it seemed like the most natural decision to offer to come in at the lower price.  She looked at me like I was crazy but with sort of an “are you serious” look on her face…I said yes and thus began the arduous task of lawyer visits, psychologist visits (all parties, including my then boyfriend, now husband), daily shots, fertility doctor visits, explaining to my family that I was NOT crazy and assuring them that I would not have issues later in life and a belly that no man newly dating a woman would find appealing (I looked like I was 5 months pregnant!). Grrrrrr…..

On retrieval day, I remember hearing that they got somewhere between 18-23 eggs from me but I am sad to say that something happened in the clinic and when it came time to fertilize them, all eggs were lost – a process that needed to be done, did not happen – My friend was devastated but decided to not pursue any sort of legal action because it would be too painful for her.  She and I, sadly, lost touch, although I would have liked to have not, considering what I felt I did for her.  I recently e-mailed her (6 yrs later) to say that I hoped she was doing well – she e-mailed me back saying she just adopted her 2nd girl from China – I emailed back saying how happy I was for her but also how disappointed I was that we didn’t keep in touch – that was 5 months ago – never heard back – guess I’m not allowed to be disappointed    or at the very least express it….She will from here on out be referred to as ‘friend’.

Cut to about 3 years from that and me and Mr. D get married – he is 34 when we marry, I am 30 – got married, graduated from college and turned 3o all within 4 months of each other – talk about packing it in!!

We pretty much started trying as soon as the wedding bands gave us the ok to ‘do it’ legally –  We tried for a year on our own but to no avail.  After about a year of trying naturally, I asked my gynecologist what a next step would be and she suggested I see the RE across the hall.  Much to my surprise, I was now back at the same clinic that I was with when I tried to help my ‘friend’.  Who, me, bitter?  Nah….

We first tried the obligatory Clomid, first cycle with no assistance, just regular BDing – nothing.  Then 3 more cycles after that with Clomid and IUI – My insurance ONLY paid for the medication, not the procedures so it was a little tough for us but we managed.  Nothing….We were ready to give up, knowing we could not afford injectables or the procedures that followed them, and then, one day at work, one of my ‘angels’ (a client of mine) came in to see me, 7 months pregnant and informs me that we have the same RE and that because she is 7 months pregnant, she has tons of injectables left over that she will not be needing (obviously) and that they would expire by the time she would need them again….SO…she GIFTS them to me!!  I call the doctor’s office while she is laying in front of me and they are super excited for me.  Call when I get my period (sorry, can’t bring myself to use AF as I have never, ever referred to it as ‘aunt flow’)….they’ll develop a plan for me!!  We’ll use a fun ‘acronym’ for period from here on out – how about……… ‘.’  That’s it – I LIKE IT!

Start doing shots at the start of my ‘.’ – followed by IUI, followed approx 2 wks later by my ‘.’.  Damn, this is getting hard!  Next month, start injectables, IUI, dreaded 2ww – nothing…..At that point, we were tapped financially from having to pay for each u/s, blood, ov, etc….so we stopped tx.  Took about a year off, tried again on our own…nothing….and now we are back doing tx. 

I should note, when I went back to my gynecologist for an annual somewhere in there, I insisted she check to see why I can’t get pregnant (scar tissue left over from egg donation had been mentioned somewhere along the line) so we decide on laparascopic surgery – Her findings – endometriosis and blocked L fallopian tube!  Yikes – she clears the endo but leaves the blockage – WHAT???  She didn’t feel qualified….HELLO?? 

 Started with ‘donated’ injectables, mixed with some we had left over from last year and doctor asked if we were ok with being aggressive….BRING IT ON!  I have women lining up to take a few multiples off our hands if that should happen….I’ve got orders for 2 boys and 3 girls….

First cycle we did without assistance but was a wash as I ovulated before they could do an IUI – bummer!  Second cycle – current one, we were really aggressive w/ injectables – injected from day one of ‘.’ until and including day 7 with HCG trigger on the 8th day and IUI scheduled for Wed April 25th (approx 6 follicles).  Mr. D and I went in on Monday of this week for an u/s and a trigger – Ovaries looked good and they did a beta (just for the hell of it) but I didn’t hear from them after that so at 5 days, I knew we wouldn’t get a + so I am not worried….(never had a booster before, though)….

Symptoms post IUI were – big time cramping, gas pains, very sore bb’s, pain when sitting on toilet (pressure from inside), bloat and OCCASIONAL waves of nausea.  Sore bb’s have subsided, so have pains and all of the other symptoms except SLIGHT nausea here and there…

So, that’s it in a nutshell….I am SO excited to finally be blogging (woo hoo) my adventure and look forward to reading others and updating you on my progress as I go forth into the forest of ‘here we go again’.  I fantasized about blogging and didn’t realize how easy it was – “welcome ME!!”….Everyone keeps asking me if I’m excited – and I hate to act like I’m not excited but so many of you have said exactly what I feel and unless you have gone through it, you cannot comment….Cautious and guarded…We’ve been through this before…8 of them to be exact and each time I have psyched myself into thinking ‘this was the month’ and to no avail….I have read over every symptom, every board, googled phrases in 17 different directions hoping one would suddenly deliver to me what I wanted to hear and….nada….so….while this is a lesson in patience, it drives home the realization that this is one of the MAJOR life situations you have no control over….. ‘.’ (period)!

Cheers “)